Angles in America

There's a hole in my heart that goes all the way to China:

Cindy Lauper lyrics that I've always considered somewhat cute and clever. But I'm missing Steve something fierce this week, and suddenly I understand the quality and meaning of those words: playful and painful, both at once.

I am presently fighting with the flu or a cold. I rarely get sick, so this is the first time in several years at least that I've felt this bad. Luckily, I'm the kind that just wants to be left alone when ill, so I make a couple of phone calls, then head back to bed for a nap, exhausted and wanting rest; get back up again and mount another task, which also exhausts me.

After Steve's illness, this is nothing. But it does remind me that things happen, unplanned, and that there's nothing one can do about it. I'm already starting to feel fatigued just organizing this blog in my head.

My BFF Jessie called just now to see if she could stop for a visit tonight after her ballet class. She usually drops by Thursday evenings and we go out for dinner, but she can't make it tomorrow. I told her about being sick, to which she replied, without a beat, "I could bring you some chicken soup," taking no heed of the infectious miasma in which she would be placing herself. Me, honestly; I just want to be left alone.

Today was kind of whacky. I got a call from my attorney, Pat, this morning, asking me to come down to their offices and sign some papers. Seems there's yet another round in the probate petition process: I can't imagine how lengthy a full probate hearing would be.

On top of that, I e-mailed the guy at Morgan Stanley who's handling the transfer of Steve's IRA into my name. I sent all the paperwork by certified mail, and I received the return proof of delivery card last week showing the packet had been delivered on the 6th of January.

Morgan-Stanley man replied that he had not gotten the package, and that the person who signed for it doesn't exist in his office. I sent a jpg image of the card along with the tracking number, letting him know that he had better find it in short order. By this afternoon they had located the packet and he was going to process it ASAP.

I'm still trying to get an appointment with the woman at Social Security to finalize my application for survivor's benefits. I leave voice mails but she doesn't return my calls. My next move (once I'm not feeling like a pile of garbage) will be to simply go down in the morning when the office opens and camp out until I'm seen and the application is complete.

It floors me when I realize that most of these processes were begun in mid-November of last year. After two months, things are still dragging on. But as my sister Kittie said, it takes at least six months for all the paperwork to be completed.

Kittie experiences "Big Bang" celebrity

Speaking of Kittie, she and husband Dave came down this weekend for a visit, probably the last one until April 15, as tax season has started and she will be working weekends and nights for the next couple of months. Dave is still free to come down, but I don't want him to feel obligated to schlep down every other weekend.

My sister is a "Big Bang Theory" fan, so one of the things I wanted to make sure and do while they were here was go to the Cheesecake Factory in Old Town, as it regularly figures into the story lines of the show (one of the characters works there as a server). So Saturday we went down to Old Town and wandered around. We stopped by a really neat (and very overpriced) store called The Gold Bug, which has nifty tchotchkes for the 21st century.

David eyes Kittie's Alfredo

The wait at the Cheesecake Factory was only about 20 minutes (it's usually much longer, which is why I don't go there too often). We ended up with a really great table in the middle of the main room. Kittie had the Alfredo (I think that's what it was), David had a Chinese chicken something (not sure about this; check out the photo and let me know what you think), and I got the pressed Cuban pork sandwich (a culinary addiction I picked up on my trip to New York): All very yummy.

The course that was not photographed was the dessert. You can't go to the Cheesecake Factory without getting cheesecake, for goodness sake. Not unless you're buying one to take home with you (which is dangerous behavior for me).

Caught using my water to clean Cuban
sandwich off the front of my shirt.

I chose the Key Lime cheesecake, which was an extraordinary (and successful) marrying of the two elements. I can't recall Kittie's selection, but David had "Linda's Cake," which is chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate, covered in chocolate and chocolate. (I just typed chocolate so many times that it looks misspelled to me.)

On Sunday, we hung out at the house. David took a spritely hike up Lake Avenue to the local donut shop and scored sugary breakfast foods. Later, I got the objects and items I had accumulated in cleaning out the bedroom, and the three of us went through it all: mostly old jewelry and cuff links, and lots of AA coins, pins and buttons. I plan on taking all of it down to Ray (my antiques client) and see if there are any valuable pieces.

In the afternoon, Kittie and David watched the Broncos-Seahawks game. I puttered upstairs for most of it and joined in near the end of the game. They ended up leaving here at nearly 7 p.m. I was quite surprised when Kittie called up just after 10 o'clock to let me know they had arrived safely.

On other fronts, I closed my small IRA account and moved the money into the bank for bills and such. It has become obvious to me that focusing on the business is not going to be a major part of the next couple months, and I have no idea when the survivor's benefits are going to kick in, so it seemed like a good way to get the cash flow going again. And the remaining medical bills will more than offset the taxes I'll have to pay on a lump sum.

This also provides the opportunity and the cash to do a little traveling once the weather warms up in the rest of the country. So I've been checking out itineraries and modes of transportation in order to put together a grand tour of all the relatives off of which I enjoy freeloading (that's pretty much all of them). If you haven't heard from me yet, you probably will presently.

More on those emerging plans later.