Wrap

Yes, it's the Christmas blog entry, with the traditional opening and closing videos for your enjoyment.

It's been two months since I put anything down here. I've been in some dark, reflective spaces during that time, all of them relating to Steve's death and two years of transitions. One of the reasons I took a year off from work was to have this time to do this mourning, beyond my physical relocation. And I've been doing a lot of it since the anniversary of Steve's death.

Natalie likes to build forts on the sectional.

I also realized well over a year ago that people just really don't want to be around that. They have genuine concern, but it is evident immediately that personal mourning is not something you can pass around and share with others. It's something you wade through on your own. So there are good days when things get done and there are bad days when I ponder my own mortality and wonder how much time I've got left in this new home.

But no matter how dark I get, I haven't gotten anywhere near suicidal, which is something mourning tends to bring up. No, I don't want to go away. I want this transition phase to be over. And I think that the New Year will bring that, especially when I pay my first year of taxes on the house.

Halloween gala costume winners

The weather has been  unbelievably mild, with highs in the upper 30s to mid-40s. Evening clouds keep the heat in, and it has rarely dropped below freezing at night. There was one period of a few days when the highs were in the upper 20s and it dropped into the teens at night. We got an inch or so of snow which stuck for a couple days, then melted with the next warmup. By all accounts, we will not have a white Christmas this year. In fact, the high is supposed to be 38º. We may get sleet and rain on Boxing Day.

Halloween, I attended the Center's Gala. I went as a trivia quiz, with 20 cards pinned to my shirt. Each had a famous quote from a horror movie, with the name of the movie on the back of the card (like "Heeere's Johnny!", which is from "The Shining"). It took some coaxing to get folks to open the cards, many saying, "I don't really watch horror films." The winners of the costume contest are shown above. There was also a Tippi Hedren in a green tweed suit with stuffed crows attacking her.

The Solberg cousins

In November I started my dental work, which is going to be a long haul. Also, we put together the first newsletter for the Center, which got published last week. We're doing it all pretty much by e-mail, so there's not a lot of personal interaction involved. The final product looked pretty good, considering, and I'm sure we'll be getting the routine down in the new year.

Final ornaments for the tree

Thanksgiving was with the Solberg clan, and it was a very casual affair, with just about everyone in attendance. There was a downstairs family room space (where the photo of the cousins was taken) where the kids could escape. Slowly, I am becoming a quantity to the Solbergs, all of whom I'm not sure I've met.

A fireplace for the stockings

The Saturday after Thanksgiving I invited everyone over to help me put up Christmas decorations. It's been three years since I last decorated for the holidays: In 2012, Steve and I spent Christmas in Eureka. In 2013, Steve had just died and I wasn't feeling festive. In 2014, I was getting the house ready for sale, so the decorations stayed put.

Dining room tree(s)

In December I fully realized that I was in the midst of the Holidays and, as I have always said, "'Tis the season to be dealt with." I promised myself that, beyond getting the holidays up at home, I wasn't going to force holiday cheer if it wasn't spontaneous. One of the things I did want to do was go down to Riverside Park and see the Rotary Lights.

Steve and Pam stopped by the first Friday of December and we had Pizza Night at my place. Afterwards, we went down and checked out the lights. We walked through the park looking at the lights, but they also have a drive-through set up so you can circumvent the park in comfort. Of course, those in vehicles didn't have a chance to stop and purchase some hot chocolate.

Entry for drive through

The sidewalk is Christmas Tree Lane

A geodesic igloo? Sure.

The evening was one of those nippy ones, and Pam brought an extra heavy coat for me, since I haven't gotten around to purchasing one in all this mild weather.

We walked in from the south, along the sidewalk, and all the park trees were festooned with lights. We were a block away and already feeling festive. We crossed the street into the park, which was ablaze with displays and scores and scores of small Christmas trees sponsored by various organizations in town.

Some displays were high tech, some were simple and obviously homespun. All of them were impressive. We circumvented about two-thirds of the park when we stopped in to have a cup of cocoa and warm up in the "warming tent" provided.

We completed our trek around the park, heading along the river side of the park. There was one animated display which I really liked. A flying saucer appears in the trees with Santa standing below with a present. A beam emits from the saucer, an alien beams down and receives the package from Santa. It's kind of blurry with all the other lights around competing, but the video's worth a look.

Finally, we walked back to the car, and Pam and Steve dropped me off at home before heading back to Ettrick.

On attempting to get a full list of siblings from Pam, she explained the family doesn't give everyone gifts. They have a white elephant Christmas gift exchange. So I really only have to worry about the immediate family.

Yes, you guessed it: I haven't even started shopping. However, I know what I'm getting each person, so that will make it easier. And I plan to hit two, maybe three stores, so it shouldn't get too hectic. And knowing that I won't be driving home in the snow from Ettrick is a plus.

So, for the first time in decades, New Year's resolutions are foremost in my mind. I am ready to put all this upheaval and change behind me, get on with life in La Crosse, and make something meaningful happen for me, especially on the work front. After all, getting someone to hire me would be far simpler than setting up the business again. Either could happen; I've given up crystal balls.

I hope this finds you well and happy, and that your holiday season is filled with joy. I close with one of my favorite Christmas cartoons from childhood (or before).