Spring Has Sprung, Grass has Riz

This just proves that hope springs eternal. The orchid plant has finally blossomed after years of semi-nurturing.

Monday was the second day of retaking the Dreamweaver Level 2 class, and I was glad I retook it. They're using new texts now, so it covers the subject matter in a slightly different way, and some things that were kind of skimmed over in the last text were spelled out a little more clearly this time around.

One of the services the school has is a set of programs called Cert Blasters, which are quizzes and drills that give you a thumbnail score on how you would have done on that portion of the final certification exams. You also get a list of chapters to review for the answers you missed. I'm pretty jazzed that I am getting 77 and 78 percent on these first time around, since the passing grade on the certification exams is 80 percent.

This week I continue to study at home. It's hard going, because the weather is just gorgeous this week. It's in the mid-70s every day, sunny, nice mild breeze, and I have to strap myself in behind the computer and study. Eeuk.

Friend Jon Jaeger in San Luis Obispo says I should take a vacation now that I've completed my Web site, and I really feel the urge to, but it just isn't in the cards right now. And the dreaded anniversary of my being made redundant (i.e., "laid off") at the Hollywood Reporter is coming up June 3. I'd really like to be back in the job market by then, or even have landed something significant in the way of employment.

I'm trying to look as "now" and technically savvy as possible for this job hunt. I even rigged the PDF of my resume so that it links directly to my Web site and my e-mail when you click on them on the page. I want to give every impression that you're getting a freshly trained Web designer who also has two decades of real-world experience in graphic design. One wants to appear a contemporary bargain, and not a ripening old fart.

The clock on the wall here in the office still says 10:27 p.m., even though it's coming up on midnight. It's such a pain to get back there and get it off the wall, and then even more difficult to try and get it back up on the nail. There are two computers in the room and both of them have quite accurate time and date displays. I'm really not sure why we have a wall clock at all. It's kind of old fashioned and ... old farty?

(Note to self: make sure always to check the time on my iPhone and don't wear my wristwatch in interviews.)

That's it. Enjoy the flowers.

Spring already, spring

It's gorgeous out today. I'm being disciplined and sitting at the computer studying. (Well, not right now, but that's another story).

After a couple weeks of on-and-off-again rain (which is what we call "winter" in California), it soared from nippy 60s into the upper 80s for the last few days. Today it is 77, which is my definition of perfect weather.

Here's a manipulated shot of the orchid budding. FINALLY! Kittie and David gave us this plant several years ago, and it floundered and never quite took off until we gave it a deep enough pot to live in. To the left is a shot of the plant from last June, when we repotted and, on the right, a picture from today. I had to stitch it together from two shots, because I couldn't get the whole plant into frame.

The buds are hovering about seven feet off the ground and have taken about three weeks to develop, but it looks like they might actually open on the first day of spring, which would be such good karma (but don't ask me why).

The studying is going well, and I'm finding out where the holes are in my knowledge of the graphics programs I have to be certified in. Like Photoshop: I have to study up on the animation functions in Photoshop.

ANIMATION!? Nobody uses Photoshop for animation; there are too many other programs out there better suited. But I have to learn enough about it to pass the exam. I forgot how dumb school is.

Steve and I took a day off yesterday and went into Hollywood to the Arclight theaters (the one with the Cinerama Dome incorporated into it) and saw "Avatar" in 3D. It was very beautifully done. The 3D was tastefully executed and, as with every other James Cameron movie, it was a half-hour too long. He is a very self-indulgent director. Just because you're a genius doesn't mean you can be tiresome.

Anyway, I don't see 3D taking over anytime soon. Most movies are better shown in 2D. Or perhaps my eyes are turning into old farts, just like the old folks I knew as a kid who said color movies were too garish, and they longed for the good old days of black-and-white and the studio system and Nazism and white supremacy: Zany old folks!

After the film, we went to the cafe at Arclight for dinner and got seated in what I call "the throne," a booth table all by itself in the far corner and a focal point of the room. We ate and watched the fabulous people congregate at the bar for pre-film drinks with the other fabulous people. I love Hollywood. You always see a few women dressed with painful trendiness, their hair perfectly tousled and they're with guys who look like white gangsta wannabes, sporting the grubbiest of clothes. I guess that means they're supposed to be geniuses, too, and dress that way to demonstrate their intense rebellious nowness.

Well, I've got to get back to the business of becoming certifiable. (And I'm nearly there, believe me.)

I'm trying to post on the blog a little more often than I have in the past, so if you don't get pictures, or the entry is really short, the overall strategy is to get people checking here more often by offering clever (if unnecessary) entries at least once or twice a week.

The Naming of Cats

Well, here she is; her big cyberdebut. It took her a day to come out from under the bed, then another half day to actually come out of the bedroom. She's adjusting very well, considering, and has turned into an totally restless affection junkie, but the bedroom is still her safe place.

Her name upon rescue was Patches. (Come on, calling a calico "Patches" is like calling a dog "Fido.") The woman at the cat shelter renamed her Patty, since it was close to Patches, and I have renamed her Pitty-Pat, in honor of Scarlett O'Hara's aunt in "Gone WIth the Wind" (Is that gay enough for everybody?). That also makes her Pitty-Pat the Kitty-Cat.

Just forget I mentioned any of that.

I named her for Patti Smith because she looks like a punk rocker. Yeah; that's the ticket.

I give up: she's Patty because Pat sounds too much like Cat, and she answers to it. You can get a pretty good look at her six-toed paws here (all four of them are hexadactyl). She's very weirdly colored, looking calico up front with hind quarters that are more tortoise-shell, and every one of her legs is a totally different color: A paintball wars terminator kitty.

She and the other cat, Marcel, still stare at one another on each encounter, eyes wide, making tiny, uncertain sounds back and forth. I think she's afraid of Marcel because he's really huge, and I think he's afraid of her with those claw-bearing snowshoes she has for feet. I had class today, so they were alone in the house, but I didn't see any evidence of blood spilled.

Twice this evening she came downstairs on her own volition, but we still have a litter box, water and food in the bedroom for her. That will definitely be going away by week's end.

Speaking of class, I retook the first day of the intermediate Dreamweaver course today (it's a two-day class), and I was amazed at how much of it I had retained from the last time. I almost nodded off once or twice because I was so far ahead of the rest of the class. The second session is next Monday, so I have time to work on the certification quizzes this week.

The rest of the week I'll be working from home, which will give Ms. Patty time to be brave with someone around to break up whatever feline altercations might emerge in the coming days. It's certainly more interesting than having Marcel moping around all on his own. He's 12 years old, she's 10 months old. I think they'll find some common ground somewhere. I mean, they're cats.

I Feel So Loved

I got a cat today. She was so sweet and loving at PetSmart. We put her in the carrier, got her home, and she's spent the time ever since sitting under the bed, just out of reach, so I can't even pet her. She's not freaked out, just extremely standoffish. I feel so loved.

Her name's Patty. That's what they called her at the cat rescue place, and I don't have a better name, so that's it for now. She's a 10-month-old, six-toed calico who comes with a free microchip (but I have to take her down to the vet to get it implanted). Spayed and with all her shots. The $110 donation was well worth it.

When Steve and I domestic partnershipped back in 2006, he had two cats already. As diligent readers of this blog will know, Buddy, the older, died last year. Since then, Marcel, also a mature cat, has made a point of being Steve's cat and lends me very little credence. Also, he's obviously bored and lonely by himself all day. So getting a new cat filled two purposes: It would give Marcel companionship during the day and would also give me a cat that would like me.

So just as soon as she decides to come out from under the bed, I'll get a picture of her and put it up here on the blog.

Thanks to everyone who sent me e-mails with typos on the Web site. I also went through each page with a fine-toothed comb and found several more myself. I got them corrected and updated the Web pages, so it should be as perfect as it's going to get.

The blog entry is going to be short tonight, because we lose an hour at 2 a.m., and I've got to make that up somewhere. I'd say don't forget to set your clocks back, but it will be a done deal by the time you read this. It'll be dark again when we get up in the early morning, but we'll have an extra hour of sun in the evening, so I guess it works out. And the weather promises to be gorgeous this week here, in the mid-70s to mid-80s. I guess, after the punctuated rain storms, spring has finally arrived.

Now to wait for the cat to emerge.

I Have a Web Site, Therefore I Am

Yeah, I know I haven't been writing in the past couple weeks here, but there's been a really good reason. School, first of all. I'm doing a lot of my studying at home now, since the labs at the Burbank facility are always overflowing, and unless you get there first thing in the morning, you'll have to wait around for someone to leave before you can get a station at which to work.

Second, and more important in an existential sense, is my Web site. I've been working on this daily for the last three weeks or so. Being my first Web site, every time I turned around there was something not working, something new to discover or learn about the coding, the styling of the text, links that didn't work, one character missing or added to code that threw everything off. And of course, everything on the site needed to be generated from scratch. Hundreds of pieces, big and small, that all had to be a very certain size and labeled and organized in a very certain way.

But it's done. The beta version of the site is up and running. I've made a few tweaks already, but it's pretty much there, as far as I can tell, and it works in every browser on which I've previewed it.

So take a look: www.markmcddesign.com. It's basically a place to showcase my design and writing work.

But it also has taught me a hell of a lot about the design process on the Web. It's very structured and not at all intuitive. You have to have a solid battle plan when you go in to start the work, and keeping things organized and well-labeled is of paramount importance.

Now that it's up and running, it's a big thing out of my hair, and opens my time up for hardcore studies getting ready for the ACE exams in May. Also, I promised cousin Robin that I would put together a site her for, so that's next on the list.

Hope everyone's doing well. Next entry, maybe I'll actually have some photos to share. The Web site will have to do for now, though. Enjoy.

Nothing Makes Sense But It's All Working Out Somehow

I'm starting this entry at about 2 a.m. on Saturday, Feb. 27. God knows when it will be put up on the blog.

I have been very busy pounding my head against the immovable wall of the World Wide Web, or at least the little part of it that I am attempting to construct. I have also come to hate every version of Internet Explorer for all the things it won't do, and for all the stupid people who are still using it just because it came with their computer.

DUMP IT NOW! Download Firefox or Safari or Opera (they're all free: Safari is good; Firefox is better, and you'll be using them in minutes). Every time I think I have a viable Web page, I take it over to a PC and preview it in Internet Explorer, and there's some kind of code that it won't read, so I have to go in and make a "patch," a special set of codes just for that Microsoft Mutant. If we can stamp out smoking in our lifetime, we can certainly stamp out IE!

I am working far harder at this studying stuff than I would at any job that I can remember having (with the possible exception of my summer at PCPA, the theater conservatory in Santa Maria, where "light weeks" meant only 60 to 80 hours a week instead of 100). Yes, it's still like learning three foreign languages at the same time, only I'm getting much more fluent than I was. I have to remember to keep jumping back and forth between programs and coding languages. If I spend too much time on one language, I forget stuff I learned for the other ones just a few days ago.

Coding, coding, coding! I go to lay out a page and things that should be inside other things aren't. Type styles that I carefully coded only moments before just don't work. There are two alternatives: wipe everything out and start over again, or open up the code for the page and start hacking away until things work. This requires sitting at the computer for hour after hour, making ridiculously large numbers of copies of files so that if everything falls apart, I can go back to a previous version and try to work myself out of the problem in another fashion.

The site is coming along well, though: I originally had well over 100 pages planned out, but soon realized how overwhelming that would be for someone who didn't want to spend the entire day at my site like it were some kind of museum. So I cheated a little bit and purchased a slideshow extension for Dreamweaver: for $30, it works fairly well, though it tends to lock up if I go back and make too many edits on a slideshow. But, wonder of wonders, I am able to go directly into the XML coding (I didn't even have a class on that!!) and make corrections and revisions instead of relying on the editing wizard in the extension.

I've also figured out how to get the header and navigation bars to stay fixed at the top of the page while the rest of the content scrolls underneath it. I'm using this for my writing pages so all the content can go on one page. The upshot of all this is that I have gotten over a hundred pages of content onto a mere 14 pages. And I think there's a nice visual consistency to it.

The main page is a pixelated photograph of me with an introductory statement (I'm still working on the final wording on that. Oddly, the writing part of this seems to be the element that is challenging my right brain the most.) When you roll over the image (which is a Flash animation), the pixelation resolves and you see a slice of the photo beneath with a label showing where it takes you; also, a panel pops up telling you a little bit about that page of the Web site and what to expect there.

I'm trying to integrate a different kind of structural element on each of the pages to demonstrate I've mastered that aspect of Web design (the Flash on the welcome page, the fixed bar with scrolling text on the writing pages, the multiple-galleries slideshows on the design pages and accordian and fly-out spry widgets on the about, contact and resume pages).

Since I have completed my core lecture courses, I have been going into Burbank to attend the labs. There are about a dozen computers set up in one large room, and there are two small fish tanks at either corner of the room. One of them holds "Killer," who is a very large, very ugly fish who has just about enough room to turn around in the tank and not much else. On Wednesday, I had lab all day, so showed up at 8 a.m. Killer's water was very murky and he wasn't doing much moving around. It was obvious that his filter had been off all night, and he wasn't looking too good; kinda gray. Turns out some good samaritan decided Killer was hungry and brought in some fish flakes ... LOTS of fish flakes, and screwed up the filter (please see blog entry "Life Is Creepy" [Oct. 19, 2009]). Turns out Killer eats pellets, not flakes, and he only needs to be fed twice a week.

One of the other students, a guy probably in his 40s, took a look and said with authority: "He's going to die in about 10 minutes if we don't get him out of there." Sadly (but luckily for Killer) the numerous small fish in the other aquarium had expired the previous week and Joel (the teacher who owns all these fish) had not gotten around to replacing them. So this knowledgeable gentleman drained most of the water out of Killer's tank, got him into a bucket and transferred him into the functioning tank. Within seconds, Killer was his frighteningly bright red self, and was genuinely happy for the assistance.

There was a momentous quality to the event for me. I really felt for Killer and realized how much freedom I have, how much my life is moving forward, even though my career's on hold and I'm working at the keyboard until I've got no fingerprints left. But it's movement; it's passage; it's ushering in the future instead of mourning and longing for the past. I've got no idea where I'm heading, but I know mastering my Web site is one of the first steps to wherever that is. I'm assuming it will be great.

And I haven't even started talking about prepping for the certification exam! We'll touch on that next time.

At Last, a Headline on This Post

Well, this week has held some milestones, albeit little ones. I finished my final lecture class at New Horizons and am now focusing on studying for the certification exams and building my Web site and that of cousin Robin. My unemployment benefits were extended for another 13 weeks, so the bills will be paid. Steve did our taxes and, instead of owing a grand or two, which I thought would be the case, I'm actually getting about $1500 back, which was a pleasant surprise.

When trying to file my state tax return, we ran into some snags. See, we're a married couple in California, but on the federal tax return we have to file as single individuals. So on one I'm a married person and on the other I'm a single person. TurboTax went schizophrenic when it tried to rectify that situation, and it wouldn't let me e-file my state return.

So we had to lie to the computer to get it to work, just like we have to patch together other parts of our lives because of this continuing inequality. And TurboTax has all the forms and stuff we need, both as domestic partners and as a married couple. It just didn't make sense to a logical system that someone is treated one way at one time in one place and another way at another time in another place.

See, we've had to keep the domestic partnership intact, even after our marriage, because some states will recognize the domestic partnership but not the marriage, so in order to be as equal as possible, we have to have both: It's kind of like having a VISA and a MasterCard just in case, even though it's all money.

I think the Daily Show did a great job in framing this with their coverage of don't-ask-don't-tell, which is the epitome of this hypocritical, schizophrenic approach to "equalitiness" which seems to suit the conservative mind to perfection.


I am so totally jazzed right now, because I just went into the code for this video and stripped out all the extraneous stuff and sized it so it would fit in this blog. It's kind of like ordering your first meal at a four-star Parisian restaurant in French and not having the waiter sneer at you. To give you an idea, here's the code that drives this video:


It started out as a string of code Comedy Central provides for blog links and such, and this is what the player originally looked like:


And here is the code of the original player layout:


Now, not only did I know what code to strip out to remove all the extra stuff and promotional links, but I also understood what all of it meant and knew what it did! You don't know how GOOD that feels after three months of pounding this stuff into my head. It's kinda like Helen Keller at the well; you know, that moment of realization: WAAAWW...WAAAWW!

KNOWLEDGE IS POWER!

My head is totally trashed. That felt good. I'm going to bed now.